Where have we been?!

These pictures are likely all backward, sideward, and upsidey the timeline.  I don't care.  It's holidays.  And both of my little lovelies are and have been pretty consistently unwell over the last four or six weeks, so I need - and want - to remind myself very muchly of their happy faces over the holidays, as days grew and blew out to be hours at parks, or resting at home, and enjoying and learning to play nicely with each other (thank god, it's been a long two years!).

The park near our home is only about a ten minute walk away, and we've only been once - can you believe that?  Sounds like I've been amazingly slack, and I probably have.  Ethan has had pnuemonia, gastro, and now our doc thinks he may have a secondary pnuemonic infection  so he's back to resting and some anti biotics to try and clear it all up.  But those two pics were taken about a week ago, on a beautiful, clear morning, when the glass bottles of water had stayed cool and the fella and I took a while to take them out and let them run, then rest, then run again...

These are the mutant tomatoes we've grown!  I could barely believe my luck when I went out to my (mostly abused and abandoned) vegie patch (and I use the term vegie patch very lightly!) and found the most amazing mutant wild tomato plant.  It's been kicking on since November, with most days until recently seeing us get about 4-6 of those beauties for our meals.  It sits not too far from our spinach-that-never-says-die.  And I recently put in a mulberry tree, and relocated a lemon tree to it also.  Our bedroom window is on the road, and I would just love to have a bit of a screen for the bricks on that north side of the house.  I must be careful to not let the trees get too tall though, as it's also where our solar panels are!  (did I even mention we had them installed?  We did- and straight away they're fighting our bill- it's BRILLIANT!)

 I've been making.  A lot.  This is an Olearia short sleeved cardigan, by Georgie Hallam in a Bendigo Woollen Mills Cotton in Blush.  I love Georgie Hallam's patterns - easy, simple, and usually seamless!  Perfect for the beginner, fancy and beautiful when finished and most gorgeous!  Her patterns can be found on ravelry.com - if you knit, or want to learn, Go There, Register and you will Know How!  It's just so good.

 More making - a pair of pj's for Alice.  I intended to sell these, but they look just too cute!

Two pairs of pants that I did sell - which I'm very proud of!

And the toys/pillows I made the kids.  Same colouring, so as to not have anyone have a hissy fit over who's got the best colour.  They worked a treat, and were just in time for christmas.

But most mornings are spent like this.  Waking slowly, watching the wiggles or Charlie and Lola, and eating breakfast and playing.  I gave up on the guilt of letting the kids watch hours of tv a day weeks ago, when Ethan was very unwell, and figured that they do a lot of 'other' stuff and deserve to relax how they'd like.  And the minute I stopped struggling with myself about it, and discussed with Ethan the importance of not 'just' watching tv but also playing, and building, and reading together, a lot of the mother guilt melted away.  I'm sure it'll be back, at some point, but for now, it's pretty at bay!

Hope your holidays have been good.  If not productive, brag-worthy and shiny when you finish holidays and return to school runs and the like, then at the very least relaxing!

Preparations for Holidays

So, I haven't been here enough to practice my calm, loving, grateful ways.  And I'd like to pretend that that hasn't affected my approach to my life, but honestly it probably has.  I'm not sure.

But I am incredibly grateful for many things at the moment...

My eversoamazing pooch, and her adaptability.
My gorgeous son; his pretending to be high maintainance whilst taking on the transtition to a new school next year; his hilarious playing with Alice (who doesn't like tickling a 2yr old at will); his willingness to just sit and draw or thumb through a book/read when he needs to calm down.
My adorable daughter; her beautiful personality; her easy going attitude and friendliness; her ability to speak, quite clearly, for her age.
My partner; for his ability to work away; his love for his children; his way of approaching chores until they're done perfectly.

As we head in to the holiday season, I'm trying to log on here every couple of days to celebrate gratitude, love and peacefulness in the home.  Especially when 'tis the season for stress, topsy-turvyness of plans, and funds that run extraordinarily low.  A little bit of yelling out loud about what I have to be thankful for will be a dose of what is needed here daily!

sheer joyful love...

Today I am thankful for simplicity.  The simple-ness of a sun-warmed strawberry, for example, can be followed by the happiness that sweet juicy hands bring, a messy face, and make the whole day of getting two year old molars melt away within seconds.

It is really just fantastic.  A tiny heart, a budding personality, and a love of strawberries.

I have been so damn busy these last few weeks that even though I've spared it a thought, I haven't spared it some time!

I am going ok though, no complaints from here.

Just having a blast.

How 'bout you?

Time...off and on....

I have been away, for what seems like a million blog days!  Truth is, I just got caught up in the Great Everything.  That stuff that happens, the stuff that gets you moving, first thing in the morning.  Like lunches that need fixing, clothes that need getting on children who need to get and move about and go to school.

We had an amazing cold, turned ear infection, turned fella coming home because I could barely function as a human.  And it all kind of caught us from there.  Feels like not a day goes by when I don't get three loads of washing to do!

But I am still thankful.  I am thankful that I have time to do all these things, and the resources to complete them.  We had a tough financial month, and are about to have another one as well, but due to good management and fantastic planning skills, I took the time to stock cupboards, pay school fees ahead of time and get stuff paid in time.  So it's not that we're in a pickle, it's that we're planned up!

I took some time this evening to grab hold of some inspiration that I got this afternoon.  I visited a friend who made a skirt for a birthday present in 90 minutes!  NINETY!!!  It was sooo lovely to watch, that when we got home I threw myself in to the sewing room and got a quick quilt done.  It's not a quilt by any quilters' standard, let me say.  But it is two pieces of fabric, with lines sewn on and batting in between.  And I'm sure my little girl will love it!

Little thoughts that become big, beautiful outcomes...

Don't you just love it when a plan comes together???  This photo, believe it or not, was taken in the dark.  Luckily for me it takes a freight train to wake up Ethan, so I got away with the flash.

You see, they say that if you put your mind to it, anything can happen.  And I am one lucky chick when it comes to putting my mind to things and then having them come out completely as I hoped.  This picture, to me, is just a little snapshot of time, testament to what can happen when my tiny mind starts ticking.

I wanted curtains in the kids rooms, and took myself off to the fabric shop in search of some cheap material.  See those curtains?  TOTAL BARGAIN!  They were $50 for two sets (Alice has some too), are fully thermal blocked curtains and the cutest little animals on them you ever did see.  Now, see that train bed?  Ethan didn't like the bed he had.  I loved it, and I have kept it for Alice.  But that there train bed?  SEVENTY BUCKS!!!  Ethan was soooo stoked that even now, about four weeks after we got it, he still shows it off to people when they visit.  And that dog....she is just the most special dog.  She's perfect, and she loves each one of us sooo much.  This particular night, Ethan was adamant that she go to sleep at the same time as him, and then he popped that red blanket on top of her, "because it was too cold Mum".  And that's where they both stayed til the morning.

And that boy?  I knew he was coming too.  And I'm so happy he's turning out to be such a sweetheart.  A big, gorgeous, adorable sweetheart.

At least today.

Thanks to the Sun...

Aaaaaaahhhh, spring.  I have a special love of spring, especially since moving to Western Australia and knowing what a Stinking Hot Summer is like.  I love every single day of spring.  The smells, the sounds, the spotting of our first ducklings, the downpours of the very last rainclouds that think they'd better rush on over and dump a creek full of water before they aren't allowed to seriously have a deluge til next March.

I just love it.  I love that we can one day have a beautifully cool day, and then the next is a practice toward the hotter ones, where we might reach the mid 20's.

Today was one of those days.  A gorgeous preview of what the sun can do for us, the warm feel of the rays on our skin.  The outdoors were perfect, and the paintings dried nice and quick!

Synchronicity...

I've had a plan to start a womens group for such a long, long time now.  And it's nearly here.  I have, by chance, met a woman that knows more of this than me, and not only is she willing to share, but she's been looking for someone to start a group like this as well!

Synchronicity.  I am thankful for that.

Seeing Past the Blur to the Beauty...

I have just realised that I can hear properly again! It's so nice, to be able to load up a song and hear it in its full intent. So I can say that I am over the worst of the last two or three weeks, my throat is back in shape and my voice no longer sounds awful or feels gravelly, and my ears aren't giving me a constant feeling of sea sickness. It's been a big cold!

But during it all, when I could hardly do a thing but sit with the kiddo's and enjoy the ability for them to watch tv, or when Ethan and I painted up our Fathers Day memory box, it was nice to still be looking past the boring every day and appreciating their beautiful natures. Alice and her daily need to get up, have a brief cuddle and then ask for "bekbas" (breakfast) before pushing Gypsy's legs apart and sitting with her back up to that adorable pooch's torso. Ethan and his nightly need - "I can't fall asleep without it" - for a story. He now knows the words to Where the Wild Things Are by heart. These things were daily rituals, even with a wobbly sense of balance and a horrid ability to fall asleep on a whim (thank god for locking doors and hidey holes for keys!), these things were stay-points to our days. I could see past their boredom, straight to their love and beauty.

Past that blur of hurried childhood and running for shoes to go to the creek with dad, past the want to have four apples for breakfast and let the fruit sugar high make them mental for several hours afterward.

Past all that, and in to their beautiful souls.

Music, and Television....lack of one, loads of the other....

Yesterday I purchased an ipod dock. Yeah, I'm behind, I know. Nevermind, never been a trendsetter anyway!

But we invested in a decent one, as otherwise I could just run the ipod through the laptop in the kitchen anyway, right? I want to hear the music, not regret hearing the music! A tinny, non-balanced music speaker is none to good for me, to be honest, and I'm not even a hifi snob. But I did have requirements - I did Not want a clock on it, I did want it to be little (cos who can find more room even in a massive open plan area, right?), and I wanted it to have clear sound. Not Loud sound, but good and clear. I want to hear the guitar strums, the back up vocals layered on top of each other even when it is 'just' the one guy, strumming and singing me a love song. Those three things were important to me. So I researched, allbeit very hurriedly, and found myself a brand that had a little system that was perfect.

And you know what? The tv hasn't been on all day. If I'm honest, it was because Ethan didn't do as he was asked. But man, he has hardly noticed - could it be the noise in this area of the house maybe? I guess only time will tell...

Still Grateful....

Hey! I've been sick. Sickity sick sick sick. an ear infection landed me quite firmly on my backside for about 10 days, and although the ringing hasn't stopped, I at least am able to stay awake and walk a little way now more than I could even last friday. It's been quite the non-adventure!

So in all that time I've been quite upset that I hadn't been able to post a blog, to be honest. I had quite a lot to be thankful for, too. I have the luck of having a partner that could go and tell his boss I wasn't able to care properly for the kids, and they sent him back home to me! Imagine that?!!! I couldn't drive, could barely stand, if I'm honest, and cooking, cleaning and even hearing the kids was becoming quite difficult. I am so lucky he could do this. There are many places where it wouldn't have been possible, lets face it!

I was sooooooo, sooooo thankful for television, for the first real time ever. The ability to turn on the idiot box, load up a movie or just put on abc for kids, then quite literally 'plonk' the kids in front? That was a pure godsend. I couldn't do anything folks, and both of them weren't well either, so yep, plonkity plonk plonk plonk they went. For about four days I think all they really did was watch tv and eat junk food.

I was thankful for our health system in Australia. Sure, a four hour wait in emergency isn't exactly entertaining. But WE HAVE A HEALTHCARE SYSTEM. The pain in my ear was unbearable. I cannot imagine what this would be like if I lived somewhere where there is not a system at all. Or even where there is just one doctor.

And I was thankful for the abundance in my life. I dunno if I've mentioned it lately, but I have not got a lot of family support here in Western Australia. In fact, without going in to the hairy detail, the family support here that I do have, I don't actually trust enough to lean on (ok, enough said). But I do have an Aunt through the fella's side, and more than that, I have a Jess. My girlfriend Jess is another Godsend. Capital G, this time. She came numerous times, this time and many others, just to help watch the kiddo's so I could attend the ER again, or do stuff, or even just to knit with in the night time. I hope she knows how much that has meant to me. Not having to take two bored kids to an emergency room is a priceless gift. Coming home and having her offer to go and grab some chow so I don't have to cook? Are ya frikkin kidding me? That's just unbelievable. Not to mention all the abundance of things like my stores cupboards, my childrens clothing, and things that just didn't need doing like washing and cooking because I am one well looked after by the universe woman. I didnt wash any clothes for over five days, and we were never at risk of running out of anything, because I am so lucky with the amount of clothing that we all have accumulated over the course of time. It sounds trivial, but it wasn't. It did take a while to catch up on it all, but the thing is I could leave it that long to start with!

Then, as the smog of the pain and the manky ear lifted, I really became thankful for my own energy. I took the pooch on her first walk in a week yesterday, and it was such a blessing. And on sunday we actually took the kids out of the house - out of the suburb even! AMAZING! So then we took them to somewhere beautiful - Point Walter. Thank you!

Moments, glimpses....beauty....

It's been a loooong week folks. A long one. We have all been sick, with a flu that has really tested everyone's ability to maintain some sort of energy level. So cooped up in the house, sick, tired, and bored, we have been hanging out at home. Oh. My. Goodness. Me, two kids, a dog, and a fenced in attitude.

Roar!

So today I thought a little retail therapy, and a lotta walking in the son, might do exactly what we need. Give us some sun, a stretched pair of legs each, and the nice fresh lungs would do us good. So we did.

And there were moments where their little hearts and minds were full, and their smiles were real and stretched all over their faces. It was beautiful. Truly gorgeous and beautiful.

And for that, I'm thankful.

Sleep...

I'm thankful for sleep today. Long, enduring, deep sleep. It only occurred to me the other day that it wasn't so long ago, I would have sold a kidney for a promise of long, enduring and deep sleep. At the beginning of the year, Ethan and Alice were sharing a room, and neither of them slept more than about 2hours at a stretch, and getting them to sleep was swear word and hair tearing out inducing.

But no more. I am lucky. Soooo frikkin lucky, that we are in an income bracket where we have to have health insurance in Australia. Our health insurance made it possible for me to take my kids to a sleep clinic, and the bill? $4000. Yeah, a 4 and then THREE zeros. But because we have health insurance, it was $250. So totally doable. So we went, and in only four nights, I came home with these amazing children I could never have imagined on the way in.

It's while we've all been so sick with this cold (and this cold is nasty, lemmetellya!) that I've become so aware, acutely aware, of how well my children have been able to still sleep. And I'm so thankful for that. Knowing that my gorgeous little Alice will pull herself on to my knee, cuddle up and say "I tired, need a bobble and a ni-nigh", and that Ethan will go and lay down in his room when he's feeling super emotional and wiped out, or at other times come and ask me to grab my knitting, help him put on a movie and sit with him to relax.

It's so good to have children who have learnt to relax. Sooo good. I can remember the days, not so long ago, when they would never have done it. And now I have the skill to know the signs, and they are able to recognise in themselves when they need the rest, too.

Absence.....

Sorry I've been gone all week. Ethan was unwell, truly unwell. A flu took out most of his class.

And now I have it. So I could be another week yet!

Gratitude...

The growing ability to see the great things in my children is such a great exercise, and one that I am, if fact, very grateful for.

I can't remember who thought of it - did I, or was it something someone said that made me think of it, I don't know. But in the few weeks that I have been practising this mindful kind of parenting, I think we've all come a little way toward further appreciating one another. I'm more willing to relax about things my kids do and take a gentler road than screaming like a banshee, and they seem more relaxed because of that noise reduction, too, I guess.

The boy in front of me is growing more and more independent each day. One day it was like he needed help picking his clothes out, the next he is nearly reading and writing different things on his own. His brain is growing in ability, he monitors his own behaviour so much more than before, and the love he has for others inspires me to do the same.

The girl, well, she's rapidly approaching two and I can barely believe that it was not far from this age in Ethan that I found out I was having another bub. She is really one easy going kid! Has her fair share of input to our conversations and ideas about how things should go, but generally is happy to go along with the majority.

And for this, and many other things, I am grateful.